The book of life
"It's about changing perceptions from meeting (and talking to) new people in life. It's about going through new experiences. Traveling to (and exploring) new places. Trying new food. Studying information. Exploring perspectives. Exposure to new content."
There's this concept of how rich your biography would be if someone were to recount it; 'The book of life'. The aim is to keep the book of life as long and as eventful as possible, as one person who shall not be named gave me a revelation: "You're a little baby, Su. You're in a shell, in a small world with walls around you. Experience life!" I have realized this pretty late but it's not too late yet. I subconsciously started believing at some point that my best times were over, that it's only downhill for me hence. I just turned 27 and my whole life is still ahead of me. This is not my pinnacle. I'm still at the start, and I'm still young(ish?)
I was gripped by feelings of indifference, anxiety, loneliness, fear(?) and the lot that night. It's weird. It's hard to explain. It's passed now, and I'm back to normal now but the hour of turning 27 was weird, man.
I used to think that travel is redundant, because you can anyway watch the content on video. But I was very wrong. Travel is about the experience. Not about the places, at all. Took my brains long enough to process that shit, but hey I'm all for it now. Gotta keep moving to keep the sanity sane.
Living in the moment
For various reasons that I can understand and cannot, I did not put much thought or effort into trying out new things and having new experiences, going to new places, and stuff like that. I was always a lost person, craving something even I couldn't decrypt. But recent experience(s) seem to have opened up my eyes. Now I look forward to new experiences. I always say yes to new things. I made that a thing; saying yes to new things. New experiences, new opportunities, new food, everything like that. So yeah this is new. Su always says yes to new things. My kernel is now equipped with new firmware and it's sole purpose is to say yes and to scour for new experiences, and having fun.
Su, an extrovert?
What has become of me? Oh my lord, Su has gone done the unthinkable. He talks to people, even strangers at times (the blasphemy!). Su has moved on past the petty shiz and sees people as people, not as moral highgrounders or lowgrounders. We're all here; let's talk and share ideas and shiz. Let's all have good times, preferably shared. We're all getting there, the black hooded creature waiting in lay to grab the next gift and drag to the nether worlds.
Somewhere along the line I've become domesticated. It's all about the homeostasis shiz. You can maintain momentum every way; I got used to the zero activity way for years. Sheesh. Years wasted, doing nothing but brooding and sulking in a drunken haze of primal insecurities and misgivings. However, 'something just clicked in me'. I don't exactly know what has changed, but I feel different. Maybe I emptied out all the sed out of my pockets, and now it's time for the wild one to take reigns. Let's do this; moment at a time, curiosity amok, life rife with tales and a mind housing all the crazy and flavor of a wild one.